.txt for life. I've just written briefly about my digital brain: https://t.co/AbIFLdfwes
.txt for life. I’ve just written briefly about my digital brain: https://t.co/AbIFLdfwes
Posts tagged with "tweet"
Who needs a fidget spinner when you've got the AirPods charging case?
Who needs a fidget spinner when you’ve got the AirPods charging case?
Last year zero trick or treaters came to my door. This year? One! Massive improvement. By 2030 I could have...
Last year zero trick or treaters came to my door. This year? One!
Massive improvement. By 2030 I could have up to ten of them and be simply inundated.
Fuck. https://t.co/4DtJoJE2mK
Fuck. https://t.co/4DtJoJE2mK
Me and my Dad don't share a lot of opinions. But we both agree that Van Morrison's 'Veedon Fleece' is...
Me and my Dad don’t share a lot of opinions. But we both agree that Van Morrison’s “Veedon Fleece” is one of the greatest albums of all time. Here’s ‘Bulbs’, one of the more approachable songs on the record: https://t.co/zziOf8tm3N
I've listened to a lot of music in my time. Folk, rock 'n' roll, soul, hip-hop, prog rock, classical, funk,...
I’ve listened to a lot of music in my time. Folk, rock ’n’ roll, soul, hip-hop, prog rock, classical, funk, country, industrial rock, jazz, metal. And I love it all. But nothing compares to Van Morrison. Because he’s not a genre. He’s a genuine religious experience.
I've been putting off watching 'Booksmart' for way too long. It's exceptional. A more fun, female '21 Jump Street' or...
I’ve been putting off watching “Booksmart” for way too long. It’s exceptional. A more fun, female “21 Jump Street” or “Superbad” with a whiff of “La La Land”, somehow.
One of those rare films that you just want to rewatch again tomorrow. Seek it out! It will make you smile.
Life is way too short for brown bread.
Life is way too short for brown bread.
You consider the Spanish as perfectly civilised fellows and then you discover that their national alcoholic drink of choice is...
You consider the Spanish as perfectly civilised fellows and then you discover that their national alcoholic drink of choice is wine mixed with coke and all of a sudden a re-evaluation is in order. (Though to be fair, I’ve never tried it. Maybe it’s delicious. A Spaniard’s G&T?).
'A German anatomist analysed a photograph of Bach’s skeleton – and it turns out it wasn’t just the composer’s musical...
“A German anatomist analysed a photograph of Bach’s skeleton – and it turns out it wasn’t just the composer’s musical output that was huge.” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) https://t.co/iD6Zj6j6Cj
FFS, we've all gotta live on Mother Earth. So can we just ruin and pollute this entire planet together in...
FFS, we’ve all gotta live on Mother Earth. So can we just ruin and pollute this entire planet together in peace and harmony?
The Wikipedia page for 'existence' is a corner of the internet that I'll *never* visit.
The Wikipedia page for ’existence’ is a corner of the internet that I’ll never visit.
The jigsaw makers have gone too far. https://t.co/cUdFP9fxvw
The jigsaw makers have gone too far. https://t.co/cUdFP9fxvw
The vegans have gone too far. https://t.co/MHPWUEAALI
The vegans have gone too far. https://t.co/MHPWUEAALI
There’s a spiders web on the street light outside my house that has silk as thick as spaghetti. The spider...
There’s a spiders web on the street light outside my house that has silk as thick as spaghetti. The spider that created it must be monstrous. And sometimes I have nightmares about it crawling through my open window whilst I sleep and slitting my throat (yes, it carries a knife).
Less than 100 years ago the entire world had to wait for a wandering minstrel to enter their town before...
Less than 100 years ago the entire world had to wait for a wandering minstrel to enter their town before they could enjoy good music.
Today - for 0.44% of the UK average national monthly wage, via Spotify - you can enjoy nearly every recorded song in existence any time you want.
Several days ago I woke up with a sore knee so bad I’ve barely been able to walk since. I...
Several days ago I woke up with a sore knee so bad I’ve barely been able to walk since.
I didn’t bust it playing rugby or running a marathon. I woke up with it. I am 27 years old.
10 years of internet time is the equivalent of 30 years IRL. There are YouTube viral videos from 2009 that...
10 years of internet time is the equivalent of 30 years IRL.
There are YouTube viral videos from 2009 that feel older than the Apollo 11 Moon landings.
In the 1600s what we now call a ‘stockbroker’ was known as a ‘stockjobber’. I prefer it. Let’s bring it...
In the 1600s what we now call a ‘stockbroker’ was known as a ‘stockjobber’. I prefer it. Let’s bring it back. I’m going to go into the City of London and say to the first person I see in a suit: “I know what you’re up to, you filthy little stockjobber.”
My Dad is getting a new phone plan. He asked me how much “energy” he needs. Turns out he refers...
My Dad is getting a new phone plan. He asked me how much “energy” he needs.
Turns out he refers to data as energy.
I recommended at least 2GB of energy.
English firefighters in the 1750s - unable to use water - would instead use 'great hooks to tear down timbers...
English firefighters in the 1750s - unable to use water - would instead use ‘great hooks to tear down timbers and thatch before sparks could spread’.
Firefighter: Don’t worry, we’ve saved your house from the fire… by tearing it down. Homeowner: Thanks mate :|
Good morning. Before you know it you'll be a dementia-ridden old man with a messed up left knee, no living...
Good morning. Before you know it you’ll be a dementia-ridden old man with a messed up left knee, no living friends and enough nostalgia in your gut to fill a steel mine. Your death will be painful and lonely with zero fucking dignity. Seize the day TODAY. Do your ancestors proud.
From todays walk. https://t.co/nJIVnA48mc
From todays walk. https://t.co/nJIVnA48mc
Let Garrison Keillor’s voice tell you about the poet Edith Sitwell. https://t.co/NK0ElH2jCd
Let Garrison Keillor’s voice tell you about the poet Edith Sitwell. https://t.co/NK0ElH2jCd
Dynamic advert insertion is the worse thing to ever happen to podcasts. Half asleep in bed, I was listening to...
Dynamic advert insertion is the worse thing to ever happen to podcasts.
Half asleep in bed, I was listening to the “The Writers Almanac” and enjoying the mellow tones of Garrison Keillor when a very loud Burger King advert jolted me. Even in your dreams you can’t hide from ads.
There are many parts of your body you expect to suffer once you get into distance running, but your nipples...
There are many parts of your body you expect to suffer once you get into distance running, but your nipples aren’t one of them. Poor little buggers seem to take a total beating with every run of 20KM or more. I have the nipple sensitivity of a post breast-feeding woman right now.
I just poked my head out of the window and my breath produced vapour. It's the 6th of September. My...
I just poked my head out of the window and my breath produced vapour.
It’s the 6th of September. My fellow Britons, winter is here. Embrace it. Bring out your steak pies and Bovril.
It's a known fact that for every £1 you spend on a bottle of wine it increases the chance of...
It’s a known fact that for every £1 you spend on a bottle of wine it increases the chance of the cork crumbling upon opening by 2%.
A £50 bottle is literally unopenable.
My least favourite image of all time. https://t.co/yTaLIj0X8U
My least favourite image of all time. https://t.co/yTaLIj0X8U
My favourite gif of all time. https://t.co/5dcn6xR635
My favourite gif of all time. https://t.co/5dcn6xR635